Jerk or cancer patient? Maybe both.

The truth is that in between chemo, when he’s not being poked and prodded by someone, Wes is just a kid like most. He lacks that sense of existential dread that haunts us as we get older – thankfully, he has no definite sense of mortality – and largely lives in the moment, not particularly concerned with his lab results, or what the next treatment will be, or even that he’s sick at all. When everything is normal and there’s no immediate focus on his condition he’s just as likely to be an asshole toddler as a charmer, and that’s OK with me.

It’s an important reminder for all of us interacting with sick kids – it’s not always easy to differentiate between irrational behavior that may be a side-effect of treatment vs. irrational behavior that’s purely a side-effect of him being 2-and-a-half years old. We don’t want to stigmatize what’s normal, or excuse what shouldn’t be excused, just because he’s sick. Over the next three to ten years we not only want to shower him with all the love and comforts he craves as he heals, we also want him to grow up to be an independent, self-assured, modest, polite, empathic person – a mensch.